Fawad Khan: ‘I am often told, theek dikhta hai, itna kya hai?’

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The last time we saw Fawad Khan on Indian screens was eight years ago, in the love story, Ae Dil Hai Mushkil (2016). It may be difficult to align that memory of him with his recent turn in Barzakh. In director Asim Abbasi's series that explores the supernatural and magic realism, we see so little of the star and so much of the actor in Khan, as he plays a single father. When we sit across from him on a Zoom call, that's our first question: What made him choose Barzakh, which is an unusual subject for a star? "It's easier for me. I stay away from the hullabaloo of social media. I have some sort of blinders on. I am not immune to the noise around me. When I started off my career, I was drawn to the glitz and glamour. I am not from a trained background as an actor. The first thing that attracts you is the bling. Very early in my career, even before I came to India, I started falling in love with the craft. I started working towards my process, studying to improve my richness of craft. I was looking for characters and stories that had something to tell. As an artist, I don't think I wish to give a moral lesson or teach ideas of morality. But at the same time, I want to give them characters that come from amidst them, do things that do or do not relate to, their conflicts and resolutions. It became easier for me eventually to move towards being an artist over a star. Stardom is collateral; but I don't think of myself as a big star at all."

One of Pakistan's most popular actors globally, Fawad tells us that saying yes to Abbasi was far from a difficult decision. He instantly was in love with 'the wildness of the written word'. "It was love at first sight. He is a very gifted writer-director. The script is the holy grail. When I take a project to anyone, I expect them to read the story. I shouldn't have to pitch it; the story should speak to them and pitch itself. Asim is amazing. You'll assume someone who writes heavy stuff isn't fun to hang with. He is crazy but equally sorted. It's his sensitivity that's beautiful. We fostered a friendship that's carried on. We took out time to do table readings. We would do physical rehearsals. The good part about these readings was that we know what we are doing before we get to the set. They were extensive and often we could go off-subject and talk about other things in our hearts. Asim allowed us to get into an intimate headspace of the character and how they fed off one another. I was able to dissect the mental anatomy of Sheryaar and where he was coming from and where he could go."

Khan admits all courage for experimenting comes with that inevitable hint of fear. "Initially, I was scared too. I was worried - did we jump into something too radically experimental? But when I saw the trailer, I was reassured. And it reaffirmed my faith in Asim. This man is capable of creating something so stunning, spectacular and amazing without a hint of pressure. I had the best time working on this. We shot it during COVID and in those days, I was seeking comfort in cooking. I have a lot of cookbooks and I am always trying different recipes. After a point, when you are in Hunza Valley (where the show was shot) - where the network is limited, and you are not connected with the world, all you have are the human connections. Cooking from scratch is the most therapeutic experience, in my opinion."

A show like Barzakh gives the actor in him space to look inward. It's a meditative experience, Khan says. "Every character you play, everything you watch, is an experience of soaking in and looking within. The last few years, I haven't been able to watch anything emotionally heavy. Some of the best, most brilliant work is emotional and I am just done with that. I found myself drawn to animation. I watched a lot of cartoons but even animation today is emotionally intense. Now I am back to what I watched when I was a teenager - Simpsons, Family Guy. As an actor, it's necessary that my mind is relaxed. A few years ago, I was told by someone - aapke zehen mein har waqt earthquake chal raha hota hai. Every character you take up leaves scars on you. It may sound dramatic but when you take up another character and their pain, there's duress and damage. It's there on every artist. I tell everyone that I need emotionally healthy roles to do. I need comedy, adventure, action and everything that's easy on the mind."

Fawad Khan features in Barzakh, a tale of unrequited love

This show takes Khan back to his Zindagi Gulzar Hai co-star Sanam Saeed. The duo are South Asian TV's most loved on-screen pair. "It's been 12 years. Back then, we didn't know each other as people. On Barzakh and a few other things that we've done together now, we have got to know each other beyond the screen. There is a friendship now. As an actor, she has come very far as an actor. She is diverse with roles, consistent and it's hard to top where she is at."

We told him that when we asked about his comeback to his producer, Shailja Kejriwal, she'd said that Fawad takes his stardom lightly. Is there a reason why he keeps himself so mysterious? "Mujhe ghabrahat hoti hai. I sometimes feel I wasn't made for this. And I worry that if I take my stardom seriously, or notice the frills of fame, I will be addicted to it. I consciously stay away from it because aaj hai toh kal nahi. I don't want to reach a pinnacle and then fall from there because the pain will be unbearable. I'd prefer it to be a light thud. Mujhe craft se ishq karne do. If I take my stardom so seriously, I will stop taking my job seriously. Best to remain unaware of it."

But one can't deny that the love for Fawad comes as much from leaning into his charm as a romantic hero, which makes women across age groups and demographics, unanimously love him. "I have tremendous Godsent luck. I am often told 'haan thik dikhta hai, itna kya hai?' People assume it's modesty. It's not. I am very realistic. Looks fade and I am grateful to all my fans, female fans. I am thankful that they have supported me so much and got me to where I am today. But I am just as scared of the men in their lives... so best to fear female adulation a tad."

We end the interview by telling him how his hordes of fans in India have missed him. He does have a show with Sony Liv, we hear and a movie with Vaani Kapoor, both of which are far from being at ‘talking stage'. It's a simple question we pose, how was he in the eight years we didn't see him and what's he feeling so many years down the line about what is being labelled his 'comeback'. "I am picking up exactly from where I left off. I didn't feel the gap then, but I feel the age now. I have grown children now. I have been selfish in the sense ki main bhool gaya aur maine thode arsey ke liye check out kar liya. How this stint pans out is something time will tell but I hope the expectations people had of me at work, is something I live up to. I hope I am just as good at my craft, as I was when I was last here. I am seeking a lot from life. I had closed myself off for a while and I am stepping out into a different world than it was when I was not around. The challenges are different - I am not hunting for good scripts, I am looking for life experiences."