Scared when he lets his mask slip

You are under no obligation to commit to anything until you feel ready

I have been seeing a guy who is great in general, but sometimes behaves badly with me. It’s like a mask that slips, and I don’t know what to make of it. My friends all think he’s great and it’s only a small part of my brain that questions this, but it’s a feeling that just doesn’t go away. We have been dating for around six months now, and it’s an easy-going relationship, but I can’t help feeling that this isn’t who he really is. It’s like I’m always waiting for him to lose his temper and then show me his true self. Am I being paranoid? It’s the only reason why I can’t commit to a serious relationship. I withhold personal information from him because I feel as if I can’t trust him. How do I move past this barrier?
This isn’t a barrier as much as it appears to be a defence mechanism. If you don’t feel as if you’re in a safe space that allows you to be vulnerable or reveal anything personal, listening to that voice is a smart thing to do. Relationships can take time to evolve, and it may be a long time before you arrive at that feeling of security. It’s perfectly okay to let that happen in its own time. To refer to your instinct as paranoia defeats the purpose of its existence. Go out as often as you can, speak to him until this feeling disappears and, if it doesn’t, allow it more time. You are under no obligation to commit to anything until you feel ready. Remember that strong relationships exist only because two people put in the work required.

How do I get out of the friend zone with someone I really like?
If you are close enough to be honest about your feelings, being direct is often the best approach. It helps avoid misunderstandings and tells you where you really stand with someone. Not everyone can read cues even if you think you’re making something obvious.

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